Tag Archives: left

It’s a righty’s world: the rest of us just live in it

-Marissa Tomko

Bill Gates. Neil Armstrong. Demi Moore. Barack Obama. Leonardo da Vinci. Marilyn Monroe. My Uncle Eddie.

What do these people all have in common? They all have a reason to celebrate with me on August 13th.

National Left-Handers’ Day is an actual thing, and I’m really happy about it. Us lefties are always getting left in the dust, fed to the wolves, laughed at ruthlessly—but we are strong! We adapt! I mean, when is the last time you saw a right-hander living with left-handed standards? Yeah, that’s what I thought.

You might recognize the 10 percent by the way our hands shimmer with the ink we just smeared across our notebooks. Or maybe you notice how we casually bump elbows with our siblings at the dinner table because we sat on the wrong side. Or, perhaps, you have seen us crumpled over in class looking like a cinnamon twist because our tiny little desk in that huge lecture hall was built for a righty, and we were too late to get an aisle seat.

If you ask me though, these are small prices to pay for the privilege of being a lefty, or southpawed, if you will.

This awesome life trait appears to be genetic. According to a study cited by ABC News, children with one left-handed parent are twice as likely to follow suit. If both parents have been blessed with a dominant left-hand, their children are four times as likely to inherit the trait. Any lefties out there looking to put a ring on it? Settle down? Start a family of left-handed babies? I’m available.

If you recently lost a basketball game or are down on your luck in the boxing arena, you might be able to blame a lefty for that. Southpawed citizens are more able to surprise their opponents, as competitors are used to playing against right-handers. In baseball, lefties up at bat can see first base, so they can easily cover all their—er—bases.

If you just got in a fight with a lefty, please step back for a hot minute. Left-handers are more likely to have a hard time sorting through feelings, which might be because there is an imbalance between the two brain hemispheres when bad moods occur. Studies also show that a lefty is more likely to have a drink in his or her hand, but not because being left-handed is stressful. We just like to kick back with a nightcap more often.

Look, I’m not saying that I feel superior because of the way I hold my pen. But allow me to leave you with one final thought. I saw it on a refrigerator magnet once, and it spoke to me.

“Everyone is born right-handed. Only the greatest over come it.” —Refrigerator Magnet

Image by Vassilis Online.